Turbo Nuclear Amazing Aries Awesomeness! – Part 4
Fortunately for Jack he does! They arrive at Iridescent Comet, the most happening bar in San Jose. Given the spontaneous and impulsive nature of his mentor, he could just have easily ended up in a riot zone just for the hell of it. Two burly and tattooed bouncers guard the door and look menacingly at them. Aries simply glides through them as they part like the Red Sea, dragging Jack along in his wake.
“How in hell did you do that?” enquires Jack, realising even as he utters the words that he’s mentally back in his home town.
“Oh, charm, charisma, and a natural projection of authority,” croons Aries sweetly. “And I guess it may help that I own the place.”
The club has a classic industrial ambience – polished steel, lots of chrome and iron, artefacts salvaged from numerous factories around the States. It’s packed with San Jose’s finest; well-oiled lap dancers cavort sinuously and seductively; and the deafness-inducing musical entertainment is provided by a top-flight nu-metal band evidently destined for stratospheric stardom. Aries toys with the idea of becoming their manager and touring the world with them. Fun, right?
Aries shouts above the throbbing music and orders a couple of drinks. He gives his mobile number to a couple of glamorous blonde beauties before flinging himself down next to Jack. Why next rather than opposite? Well, so he can see and be seen of course!
If there’s an opportunity for action or picking up a high status mate he wants to be there first. That’s what life is about in Aries’s world, being aware of your aims in life and constantly on the lookout for opportunities to achieve them. The brat of the Zodiac is like a search-beam constantly scanning the horizon for opportunities to move onwards and upwards.
But is that all there is to winning the game of life – setting challenging, inspiring goals and taking action? And why does everything have to be done in such a rush? Are there times when its better not be an early adopter? Are there times when it’s better not to be so obviously out for yourself? Well … yes, but some of the other Zodiac mentors will tell you about that.
And now … it’s back to Aries and Jack in clubland.
“So you’re here to teach me about hitting my goals, are you?” enquires Jack, keen to get the conversation back on track.
“All hard work and seriousness makes Jack a dull boy, but fuck all that, here’s the shit you wanna hear.”
“I’m here to tell you about how to make a start – how to initiate a project and how to take action. That’s what I’m about – coming up with new ideas and getting them off the ground. I’m about rising to challenges and overcoming obstacles, about achieving the seemingly impossible. If I’m not challenged I get bored and sometimes self-destructive as my energies turn in on myself.”
“If you want to talk about maintaining progress or carrying on someone else’s work, talk to Taurus or Capricorn. They often come in and implement my ideas once I become bored. Sometimes I need them to make things happen as much as they need me to come up with the ideas in the first place.”
“So do you give up on all your goals, then?”
“Nah, I always aim to have achieved them before I get bored! Then I move on to the next challenge. Leo and Sagittarius are the same. It’s our fiery elemental nature – we light up quickly, take action and if we run out of fuel, basically our desire and motivation, we just burn out.”
“So when you suffer burn-out it’s because you’re bored, right?”
“Sure, I can always rise to the occasion when a more interesting challenge comes along. Speaking of which…did you see that blonde at the bar? Phwooar! Back in five!”
He is struggling to take this all in. Jack’s home town never presented any challenges, apart from avoiding boredom and the attentions of curtain-twitching neighbours. The band kicks off a hard-core reinterpretation of ‘Tainted Love’, as a tanned, toned and well-oiled red-haired Lap Dancer with tasselled breasts gyrates in front of the aghast Jack.
“Not from around here, are you?” she grins.
“That obvious?” stutters the lad, trying to cover his embarrassment and growing excitement.
“Just a little”, she giggles, her eyes fluttering and her lips glistening in the stroboscopic lighting. “I’m Lola. Wanna private dance with me?”
Aries bounds over and collapses into a leather chair with a huge cheesy grin all over his face. He discretely slips a $50 note into her virtually non-existent panties. As Lola gyrates towards another table, Aries flaunts a business card under Jack’s nose.
“Got that blonde’s number”, he smirks, “I just had to have it. What does that tell you about goals?”
“Fuck all!” retorts Jack, now totally out of his comfort zone, frustrated in ways he dare not admit even to himself, and rapidly coming to realise why many people find Aries so damn irritating!
“I can’t be bothered,” retorts the ever-so-slightly jealous Jack. “Why don’t you tell me?”
“That tells me everything about your goals!”
“Like, they’re so compelling you can’t even bother to find out how to achieve them. They’re that exciting!”
“Ok, so I have to set exciting goals – big revelation.”
Aries lights a cigarette and drains his Martini, snaps his fingers and another drink appears in due course.
“You have to set goals that pull you towards them like that woman pulled me towards her. They have to be so irresistible and compelling that there’s no alternative but to achieve them. It’s no good bullying yourself to achieve something you don”t care about or want. Even if you get it you’ll be unhappy.”
“OK, so how do I do that then?”, says Jack, cradling his Dead Guy beer.
“First of all they have to be your goals, not somebody else’s. It’s no good striving to be a doctor because your folks want you to if what you want to be is an actor. You need to set goals that fit in with who and what you are otherwise there’s no way that they’re going to pull you towards them. You need to live your life not some other mofos.”
“People sometimes tell me I’m stupid as I ‘waste’ energy chasing goals that bore me once I get them. They don’t realise I need the challenge of hitting a near impossible goal! I need to come first and I need to be seen to come first. Some of my values are initiating, creating, being challenged and competition. That’s what I base my goals on.”
Aries gulps down his newly delivered Blood-of-the-Ram cocktail (Polish Vodka straight from the freezer, Vintage Champagne, Tomato Juice and Worcestershire sauce) before elucidating.
“Let me give you a tip. Set goals that make you feel smug, that appeal to the ego. Whose gonna get excited about achieving a goal that makes them feel less of a man (or woman)? Who wants to set a goal that sees them fall in status?”
“Even those so-called gurus that prate about living the simple life do it to feel spiritually superior to the rest of us! How are you going to motivate yourself to pass your accountancy exams if you think accountants are dull? Get congruent! There’s no point fulfilling a partner’s long held desire to get into an exclusive club if you feel it’s full of wankers that you won’t like! Where’s the joy in achieving a goal like that?”
Despite his reservations, Jack nods his head sheepishly.
“Your goals need to align with your Will, which expresses who you really are and what you’re truly about as a person. Manifest your Will, and all your desires are met, because you’re in harmony with the energies of the Universe! Sure, we’re in Cali, but what I’ve said isn’t just some old New Age bullshit. Take a look at this while I go to the bar.”
Aries thrusts his mobile phone into Jack’s hand. The phone rings and starts to pulsate slightly, and he presses the receive button. A message from The Upanishads scrolls up the small screen:
“You are what your deep driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.”
“Awesomeness”, thinks Jack, experiencing an A-ha moment, not uncommon in the presence of Aries, who is now at the bar. In spite of there being a large queue he manages to get served first. Another 10 points on the smug-meter! Don’t you just hate it when he does that?
“Where was I? Yeppers, setting goals that fit in with who you are. If you do this you free up loads of energy for achieving them in rapid time. And until you get a clear vision of who you are, it’s going to be much, much harder to set goals that satisfy.”
“But don’t you lose friends if you suddenly change into someone they’re no longer comfortable with?”
“H-e-l-l-o! Of course you’ll lose some. Others will grow with you and you’ll accumulate new ones. It’s far better to lose a few friends than to spend the rest of your life living one big lie. The only person paying the price for this is you! Why make life so damn hard? I know that life should be a challenge but at least make the challenge worth embracing.”
“You talk as if hitting my goals is purely down to me. Surely that isn’t the case?”
“You do have to take others into account. But you’ll have to use other mentors for that. Accommodating or making use of others isn’t my forte. Try Scorpio, Gemini and Aquarius for that. In fact why not try Taurus? With any luck she’s got that text message by now and should be on her way. Ah, here’s the fat old Bull now.”
A generously built, opulently dressed sensual woman in a silk suit ambles confidently towards Jack as Aries, eager to move to pastures new, departs leaving behind a parting gift. It’s the latest generation Tablet computer that most early adopters would die for, with a specially encoded message…